Praise to You, Lord Jesus Christ, King of Endless Glory! Glory and honor to the almighty, everlasting, God. You are God, all-merciful, all-loving, all-powerful. You are the Gate, the Door, the Way. You are the great I AM, King of Kings, and Lord of Lords.
Thank You, Almighty, for Your provision and love. Thank You for access to the Sacraments. Thank You for Your perpetual presence in the tabernacles and monstrances of the world. Thank You for Your guidance and discipline. Thank You, even, for the trials, pain, and suffering for I trust all is allowed for the salvation of souls.
Forgive me, Lord, for my selfishness. Forgive me my short sightedness, and constant comfort seeking. Forgive me the times I give into worry, anxiety, or despair. I trust; help my distrust. I believe; help my unbelief. Forgive me the moments I have failed to see You, hear You, and obey You.
Last week, I was blessed to carve out some time to meet a friend for Adoration. Looking at the monstrance in front of a white wall, I could not distinguish if the host was there. I think to myself, “He has to be there – it’s Adoration. His “porch light” is on.” I just could not see Him or distinguish Him from the white background.
Finally, I looked BEYOND the monstrance to its shadow. If the montrance was empty, there would not be a shadow, as the light would pass through the glass. If He is there, light could not pass through. There, of course, was a shadow. He was indeed there, as expected, but what a weird experience! I knew He must be there, but my senses could not be trusted.
God began whispering a lesson to me in that experience- a lesson about looking BEYOND, changing perspective, not just seeing what appears, but what does NOT… He reminded me that I cannot trust my senses!
This echoes something I have found myself expressing to my children, myself, and even friends. “Feelings are real, but they are not reality.” We can feel hurt by something someone said or did, even when their intention was not to hurt. We can feel hopeless, even when we proclaim and live our faith in He who is Hope. We can feel unloved, even when we know we are loved by Him who is Love. We can feel or sense lots of things that do not reflect reality, especially the reality of who He is and who we are in Him. I often am reminded of how far the distance from head to heart!
Maybe He was hidden from me at Adoration, just so I could be reminded of his lesson, or that I could practice looking at things differently. Maybe I just need to sit closer, or check my eyesight. I do not know; I may never know, but that’s okay! I am just grateful He allowed me to have this little lesson.
Have you had a lesson lately? Can you recall and share when your senses failed, or when the distance between what you know and what you feel was great? I would love to hear all about it!
Photo by Jacob Bentzinger on Unsplash
